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FIC: Life With Two Husbands (1/1)

Title: Life With Two Husbands
Rating: T (being paranoid here – some might squick over this)
Author: tkel_paris
Summary: It's been almost ten years since the events of Idris' Revenge. Donna Noble tells us how life turned out dealing with being married to both the Doctor and his twin.
Disclaimer: This didn't happen, so the characters aren't mine. Still.
Dedication: To all the reviewers of “Idris' Revenge” who begged for a sequel. Your wish has been granted.
Author's Note: I wasn't going to write this, but I was looking for ideas for the May Story-A-Day challenge, and this one popped up. THIS is the end of this fic-verse. Capiche? Thank you. :) And telling it in Donna's POV entirely helped me finish it.

Life With Two Husbands

Started May 24, 2012
Finished February 6, 2013

I'm no longer unfamiliar with feeling like a beached whale. Albeit one that could stand being on land. Mind, I sometimes question that. Still, better than before – people know I'm pregnant rather than fat. I've had enough of that accusation, don't you think?

Oh, I have good reason to feel so huge. I'm carrying multiples – yet again! This is my fifth pregnancy in ten Earth years!

Right, it could be worse. Could've slipped another pregnancy or two in there. At least we tried to space them out a bit. And stayed a bunch in the Vortex to space things out more, given the two-year Gallifreyan pregnancy. That's in Earth years, by the way. I didn't get lucky and see it shortened to Human time-frames.

Sometimes I think my body has become a weird science experiment with all this growing alien babies inside me business. Doesn't help that I still have the Doctor's mind inside mine, but at least I'm still whole.

Oi! Excuse me, just had a few gentle kicks inside me. Draws me out of my thoughts every time. I can't tell you how amazing it is to feel the rush of my growing children's emotions floating to my mind. Can I be faulted for a soft smile crossing my face?

Oh, you're wondering what happened that I'm carrying alien babies? Well, maybe you should be asking why my wedding ring has gems nothing like what you see on Earth, or that there are identical gems on either side of my birthstone. It's really three rings – a sort of engagement ring with my birthstone, surrounded by two other rings that each has the other birthstone.

Why? Well...I'm married to two men. Rather, aliens. Okay, one is technically half-alien, but if we're going to be nit-picky about it, one could argue that I've married my own son.

Yeah, confusing as hell? Tell me about it. Should've been there when we had to explain it to my mum. I thought she was going to have an aneurysm. Gramps was just shocked about the two husbands and two Doctors part. Seems he was secretly hoping that the Doctor would marry me.

Guess he saw through the Doctor's denials before I did. Guess everyone else did, too.

And I thought one Doctor was plenty to deal with. Two is almost unbearable sometimes. Mind, they do take care to avoid speaking in stereo – there were once five Doctors in the same room, and that memory left an impression on him. Well, on us all. I do have the memory of that crazy moment. Seems a time crash can't happen without some bloody awful disaster to avert.

I really hope I don't witness any. Not sure I want to know what Spaceman will look like when he regenerates the next three times.

Oh, excuse the noise. Mum and Granddad are trying to calm down the rascals in the kitchen. They shooed them out of the living room so I could have a moment of being by myself. I'm never alone when the skinny boys in suits are around. They went through a phase of not letting me do a thing for myself! Well, I put a stop to that within an hour! I needed physical activity that didn't involve the bedroom and I still do! And no, I'm not saying how we resolved that! I get enough questions from Jack about whether I get horny enough to want two mouths and four hands on me at once! It's none of his or your business!

I will explain a little bit about my life because I see you're still stuck on the married to two Doctors detail. It is more than a bit unfair to call the second skinny boy Doctor – he's someone different, despite having all his memories and mine. Maybe partly because of that.

So the Doctor's old enemy the Daleks came back. In force, despite the Time Lock. Stole 27 planets, including Earth, to power a machine to destroy reality. Which would've destroyed all of the multiverses and therefore all of Creation. What stopped them? I did – with some help from Michael.

You might call him the Duplicate Doctor. He named himself after the whole mess was resolved, after our guests left the TARDIS. Couldn't name him Benjamin 'cause that would've been hard to explain. Saved that for his and my firstborn son. Oh, I'm getting ahead of myself!

Anyhow, he was the Doctor's old hand. That ghastly sight the Doctor kept in a jar that bubbled when we were dragged to Messaline and when Jenny was born? Yeah, that. Well, the Doctor was shot by a Dalek thanks to Rose coming back. The idiot was so filled with conflicting emotions that he ran to her, and didn't see the bloody creature appear. Thank God for Jack – Rose's big gun was worthless once she saw the Doctor was injured. Not to mention her – she didn't even shoot. She should've seen the Dalek first since it was her side of the van! If not for the hand, the Doctor that I know would've died.

And that would've been sad. I'd become used to the skinny weasel. Much more than I was willing to admit to. Besides, I thought he was in love with Rose.

Okay, best leave that in the past.

As I was saying, he sent the excess energy into the Hand, and then I later became trapped inside the TARDIS. Thought I was gonna die, but then I felt compelled to touch the Hand, which was pulsing with the energy. It caused a two-way Meta-Crisis. Made the Hand grow into the person who's now called Michael Noble and ultimately placed a copy of the Doctor's mind into mine.

No, not Smith. Michael didn't want that name, and didn't care to pass it on to his kids. Hence all of my children have my name.

Oh, you're making me digress almost as much as my husbands can! Will you let me finish my story?! Thank you. I think I've earned a salute or a sainthood at this point given what I've lived through.

So I saved all of Creation. Not the Doctor. Not Michael. Me. Thanks to Davros trying to kill me. Who knew an energy blast would fire the Time Lord awareness? Wish there'd been another way to stop the Daleks, but I think Michael did the only thing that could be done. Poor Spaceman.

Anyway, those complicated emotions where Rose was concerned? The Doctor was thinking of leaving Michael with her in Pete's World, as punishment for his committing genocide. What he didn't know was that it would ultimately destroy both Michael and me by keeping us apart. I had no idea how possessive the Doctor could be until I had to negotiate things that first day!

Well, the TARDIS had other ideas. She was angry with Rose, and with the Doctor. So she took over and flew us to Pete's World, and once we were outside she used some energy to become Idris.

Oh, correction. She already was Idris. She is the Heart of the TARDIS. Which made what Rose did in ripping her open rape in a worse sense than the Doctor had suspected. Now I call her Idris but still refer to her as the TARDIS. Or Old Girl. Depends on how much of a Spaceman moment I'm having.

So Idris gave Jack what-for over not hugging me, the Doctor what-for over his plans, and completed the bond that had started to form between me and each of the Spacemen. That broken bond was what would've destroyed us, and would've destroyed this Doctor. He needs someone to stop him. Perhaps more than any of his other selves. More importantly, it would have killed me.

Destroying the Dimension Cannon was the right call. That thing caused too much damage. It's what she did to Rose that I have problems with. Forcing the Doctor to watch as someone else he knew had their mind wiped? I can't condone Idris' actions. Even though I understand the anger and feeling trampled upon that drove it.

I wish she could've thought of another option. She swears it was the only punishment fitting Rose's crimes. Since I live most of the time inside her, we've agreed to disagree. Besides, I need her on my side for when my husbands are being too idiotic.

Oh, I hear Idris returning. Spacemen must be back from their run for my latest cravings. I've been exposed to a lot of foods during my journeys. You have no idea how off-putting it is to be disgusted by foods when you first see them and then suddenly crave them to no end while pregnant! I'll spare your sensibilities and not tell you just what they're going for now.

Aye aye. There go the kids out the door. All ten of them! Yeah, I had triplets twice and twins three times. And it's twins again. Not fun, those pregnancies. You look bloated really early on, and the effects are extreme.

Not that they treat their dads any different. Or are treated any different. Doesn't matter if they have one heart or two – my Spacemen treat them all like their own. And our rascals enjoy a good tickle fight with their dads. Best to let them have this moment – I can enjoy my disgusting sandwich in peace and then we'll go through the process of making sure each gets individual attention from each of us. That's actually been a harder thing to work out than the bedroom.

And no, I'm still not telling you! You'll go straight to Jack! My husbands don't need him to know what we're up to! It took every bit of command I have to convince them to quit trying to one-up each other and...

You know what? You're going to forget I said that. Because I know things you'd rather I not repeat. I've been nice about it, but I will use that knowledge if you don't keep Jack from finding out.



( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
Feb. 7th, 2013 12:45 pm (UTC)
Oooh YES to this fic verse! There needs to be whole genre for this OT3, like there is for metacrisis fixit fic! Oh the possibilities!

Loved this! Cheeky, saucy fun!
Feb. 7th, 2013 09:12 pm (UTC)
*sighs* I might have an OT3 idea, with some alien biology differences involved. Just give me time to feel comfortable writing it. :)

Thanks! Cheeky and saucy are the descriptors I love to see applied to a fic like this! :DDDD
Feb. 7th, 2013 05:17 pm (UTC)
"Depends on how much of a Spaceman moment I'm having." You have such a lovely turn of phrasing sometimes! That is so apt! Can you imagine what it would really be like to have his mind roiling about in yours?! He talks a mile a minute; his thought process must be even more frightening!

And, I'm sorry, but we really DO need to know how they "resolved things" in the bedroom! I promise not to tell Jack!!

Feb. 7th, 2013 09:16 pm (UTC)
Yes, that's the scary part, isn't it? D: But thanks! :D

*rolls eyes* We'll see. ;)
Feb. 7th, 2013 09:20 pm (UTC)
*is not above begging*
Feb. 7th, 2013 09:25 pm (UTC)
Your muse will have to beg mine, and mine is booked right now. Feel free to write your ideas for how they did it. ;D
Feb. 9th, 2013 08:00 pm (UTC)
*joins in begging* especially after you said this:

"I might have an OT3 idea, with some alien biology differences involved. "

Feb. 10th, 2013 05:46 am (UTC)
Oh, you too?!?!

*sighs* Decide, Sweetie. Which would you rather see:

This OT3 idea


the Tempting Trope sequel

Your choice decides which I write first. But I don't promise it gets done anytime soon.
Feb. 10th, 2013 04:23 pm (UTC)
Noooooooes you can't make me choose! I want BOTH durnit! I'll wait as long as it takes!
Feb. 11th, 2013 05:46 am (UTC)
*throws hands in the air*

I'll see what Muse does first. They might turn into your next birthday and Christmas presents. (You might be be sharing the latter with serenityslady.)
Aug. 30th, 2016 02:34 pm (UTC)
I really loved this ;)
The Doctors trying to one up each other (you are allowed to elaborate this with a DVD extra if needed... ;) )

The math seems to be a problem though.
I can't seem to make it 10 children in 5 pregnancies like Donna says in the beginning of this story: "This is my fifth pregnancy in ten Earth years!".
"There go the kids out the door. All ten of them! Yeah, I had triplets twice and twins three times. And it's twins again."
Triplets twice, makes 6 children
Twins three times, makes 6 children
In total, that makes 12 children, in 5 pregnancies.
And of course the current pregnancy, also twins. A healthy 14 children in 6 pregancies.
And also that Gallifreyan pregnancies take 2 years. 5 pregnancies each of 2 years make 10 Earth years together. And she spaced them!!! (perhaps by staying in the Vortex, but still...)
Also she's pregnant again... Wow... She must feel really lived in ;)

Outside of this, I enjoyed it thoroughly!

Edited at 2016-08-30 02:56 pm (UTC)
Dec. 31st, 2017 06:42 am (UTC)
Oops. That was supposed to be 12 kids with the current pregnancy counted. I must've missed something somewhere.

I have the feeling that a new OT3 fic is more likely than a DVD Extra to this one. But who knows? If I'm really feeling weird it might happen. :)

Sorry I missed the review for so long.
Mar. 22nd, 2018 07:31 pm (UTC)
OK, now I'm the one to miss this for months. Been away for a while.

A new OT3 fic? :))))
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )

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